Dear Cik Electric Tomato,
I haven’t had my heart broken for a long time. And I have never been married. So I cannot even begin to fully understand how you feel. However, I was once in a relationship where the prick I was seeing was also seeing someone else. When we were in a relationship, he feigned loyalty and said he would love me til the end of his life. Today he doesn’t love me anymore, but he is still alive, apparently Death did not claim him despite him breaking his words.
Such is life.
I was the one who suggested the break-up because the distance and the fact that we wanted vastly different things made the relationship very difficult to upkeep. At the time, no hard feelings. Everything was fine. I thought it was one of those civilized break-ups where you could remain friends.
As it turned out, when we were dating, he was also dating the other girl. Maddeningly, I only found out about this after we broke up, thanks to the loose lips of a mutual friend who was aware of the trickery. Although we no longer had any relationship to speak of by then, the pain hit me like a Shinkansen train. Fucking loser. If you want to be with someone else, grow some balls, please. He only confessed when I confronted him. And then, he had the gall to tell me that this was God’s plans. Please. Do not blame God for the awful things that you did.
Cheating is cheating. If it happens while you are in a relationship with someone else, that’s cheating, you prick. It doesn’t matter that I discovered it afterwards.
We had only one argument with each other in our entire lives and it was about this. My lightbulb moment came when he told me “Don’t be so full of yourself,”.
You know what, Cik Electric Tomato? He was absolutely right. I was angry but I should not feel sorry about what happened because it wasn’t a reflection of who I am or my character. It was his. His weakness. His deceit. Have a good life, I told him, without me in it. Good riddance.
We haven’t spoken since. The friendship broke. I am not sorry about it at all. My life has been great since. His life may be great too, I don’t know and I don’t care.
One night, my sisters asked out to go karaoke. I excused myself to go to the bathroom. When I came back, my sisters were so excited about the song that was about to play. Here, this is for you kak, said my sister and handed me the microphone. The song was Daughtry’s Over You. I liked it so much, we put it on repeat.
It doesn’t seem possible right now, but some day you will wake up and feel better that this cheat is out of your life for good.
In the meantime, please listen to the Lipat Kain playlist to mend your heart. I play this on maximum volume when I am folding my clothes because I hate folding clothes like a heartbreak. I also play this Lipat Kain playlist when I go out running because it reminds me that I am strong and I can push through any challenges and obstacles.
Your ex-husband will not miss you. But that is okay. Because you ain’t gonna miss him at all too. Just take care good of yourself, be hot, be successful and take heart that whatever this is, you will conquer it too.
Else, let’s go torch his car. I’ll bring the lighter. Peace y’all!