- If you order a drink with the mamak, make sure the order contains not more than 4 syllables. For instance: teh o ais limau, teh tarik suam. Do not attempt to order something like teh o ais limau kurang manis or teh tarik kurang manis suam. The mamak will forget and get your order wrong. I saw this happened in front of my very eyes and are still open-mouthed gobsmacked at the accuracy of this theory.
- Do not argue about Winona Ryder’s breast size. You will lose. You cannot beat breastmen although you are a proud owner of a luscious pair of breasts yourself.
- Do not EVER offer mints called Oral Fixation. Unless you are willing to listen to crude sex jokes all night long. And you being the butt of these jokes.
- No words necessary. Subtle eye movements are enough to convey interest about the appearance of possible toads.