Waiting for free money. Why? Coz my horrorscope says so.

This is my horrorscope for this week:

november 22 – december 21
This week is all about you, as the emphasis shifts away from the other people in your life and more towards your own wants and needs. Despite your optimism and general good humour, celestial trends have not been entirely on your side for such a long time, it has grown a little wearing in the end and you desperately could use the odd break and a few positive things to cheer yourself up. Although you’ll still need to wait a little for the best of this, Venus suggests that meanwhile it’s a great time to pamper yourself more, with some activities you’ll enjoy, a nice meal and perhaps a few new clothes as well.

I am not interested in any of the hocus pocus, I am interested ONLY and ONLY in the last line – which I marked in bold in case you missed it the first time you read it.

Job, please take this as a cosmic instruction for you to send me some money so that I can get a decent haircut. My white hairs are showing and since you are the tallest person I know you would be the only one who would notice; hence it is befitting you should pay for the colouring and styling. THB3500 should be enough cover all that; and you can throw in another THB5000 to buy me some shoes or short dresses as a gesture of goodwill.

People have been telling me I am losing weight. F*cking liars. I just weighed myself on the SECA machine and instead of losing weight I have actually gained some! I think  they’re just lying to get me to put on more weight so that they can feel good about themselves. The hari  raya open houses are making liars out of people, people!

I have work yapping at my heels so better post tomorrow. Kak Rubs, here’s a shoutout to you coz I know you read this. We’re way overdue for brunch (did you think I’d mention the boy and the fail to mention you?)

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1 Comment

Filed under Laugh

One response to “Waiting for free money. Why? Coz my horrorscope says so.

  1. PC Ng

    All I can say is, bring the good luck on… I welcome it with wide open arms. December is coming which can only mean one thing :)

    Capricorn

    Jupiter remains in your sign until January, giving you all the cosmic goodies for a year or so, before it moves on to highlight the next person and everybody subsequently in turn. Jupiter is the most obviously fortunate planet and with the degree of caution that you naturally possess, can bring plenty of good luck your way, allowing you to reap lots of benefits personally, materially and in terms of success as well. It’s important to be aware though, that these are not the only criteria by which to judge your progress and there are factors such as your emotional and spiritual development that you cannot neglect either.

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